Real Relationship stories: Meet Clive and Zanele
Clive and Zanele had been dating for a little over a month now. He was cute and she was pretty. Clive possessed a sense of youthfulness Zanele really liked but he wasn’t too young. He was 34 years old and Zanele had just turned 30 that January. Age was important to Zanele because she never really saw herself as a cougar, dating younger men, but she didn’t want to date way older men either. So, Clive was the perfect mix of A younger but a little bit more mature type of guy.
Clive was from Congo. Well, he looked like he was from Congo but he was very South African. He was born and grew up in Cape Town. Clive has a couple of brothers and sisters all over the world and he could have chosen to work anywhere in the world but he chose to get a job in his home town, Cape Town. The job later catalyzed his move to Johannesburg and there is where he met Zanele, two years after the big move.
Zanele is a Pretorian girl. She loves having fun, going out, wearing very skimpy outfits and showing off her strong legs. She and Clive met at a party organized by one of her closest friends, Tshidi. Tshidi loves having people around and throwing fun parties and events for everyone to enjoy. She had recently started dating this huge, foreign, hot and very dark skin guy. So, when she suggested a braai, one afternoon, he suggested to bring some of his friends too. So, Tshidi invited Zanele and 10 more friends and Clive was invited by Tshidi’s Boyfriend.
The romantic Story on how they met
The party during that weekend was chilled. It was outdoorsy with light music. Tshidi had previously told her man that Zanele is single and the boyfriend had passed on the message to Clive. But Clive wasn’t convinced immediately. Tshidi’s man had to send pictures of Zanele to Clive. Clive fell madly in love with Zanele’s looks through pictures so, when he finally saw her, he was already head over heels.
Zanele has such a great body, he thought. Does she gym often? He continued thinking. From the side profile, Zanele has a similar body to the one that is called Beyoncé. A round derriere, Double D size Breasts and a relatively small waist. Clive started to approach Zanele when Zanele noticed that someone was approaching her from the left, she slowly turned her head towards his direction and gave a brief smile as their eyes locked.
Hi, he said, as he got closer and extended his hand. She took his hand and said, hi to you too, as they both giggled, followed by an awkward silence. I’m Clive, he introduced himself. In an accent that seemed like it was manufactured in the States. Hi Clive, she replied back. I’m Zanele. The two spoke for what seemed like hours, outside the balcony, as it seemed like they had so much in common. Around midnight Clive asked Zanele for her numbers and Zanele naturally gave him her digits as she really liked how he made her feel. Zanele felt warm butterflies in her tummy as he walked her to her car, then spent another 30 minutes of talking outside the car with her back leaned against the drivers door. And finally said goodbye.
The perfect date in the city
The day came for Zanele and Clive to see each other once more. It was 7 days after the braai. They arrived at a very popular coffee shop in Pretoria and immediately started sharing stories. They asked each other questions on politics, religion and then the dreaded money talk.
So, if you go out on a date with a girl, do you expect her to pay for her own food? No, not really, Clive answered. I will pay for our date, I don’t mind. Zanele could see the uneasy reaction of the money conversation on his face, but she asked anyway. She needed to know if he was going to expect her to pop money for ANYTHING, so she can prepare herself. Lucky for her, he said no.
The date went well and they decided to see each other a couple more times after that and both Zanele and Clive, enjoyed each other’s company
The reality after one month of a relationship
Clive is a really nice guy, she thought. It’s about time I go all the way, she pondered. That night Clive invited her to Midrand mall of Africa for a movie, the following day. Clive drove to the mall and Zanele decided to uber her way to the Mall of Africa because she didn’t feel like NOT drinking.
Clive looked really good, while walking towards her at Sterkinekor. Zanele thought that he looked like a taller version of Ty Diggs in black distressed jeans and a grey t-shirt with a gorgeous smile. Zanele looked at herself while passing a mirror and nodded her head. Yep, looking like fire. She whispered to herself in delight. Clive got closer and gave Zanele a hug. He could not help but notice that she smelled really good and her blue jeans, white top look with timberland boots were making people’s heads turn. She looked like a million bucks with all those curves. She looked gorgeous. Zanele was wearing her weave long and her makeup was light with touches of pink lipstick and rosy cheeks. Her skin was chocolate caramel brown and her face more immaculate this day than any of the previous dates.
Clive payed for the movies but didnt buy popcorn. It didnt bother Zanele as she wasnt hungry. But when they sat down and started watching the trailers, she felt a bit peckish.
Do you want popcorn Clive, she asked. Yeah, i don’t mind, he replied. Can i have some money, i want to go buy it, she asked. . He gave her the money and she walked out to get the popcorn before the movie began. Clive was a bit annoyed that she had asked him for the popcorn money, he thought that because he had payed for the movies, she would at-least pay for the popcorn. Nope, no such luck.
Modern dating expectations from guys
But Clive was a bit worried about the relationship/ friendship because it seemed like he was always the one paying for things for both of them. He didn’t like it because he grew up in cape town where girls he knew would ALWAYS buy and pay for their own drinks. Or contribute on a date. But, ever since he moved to Joburg, he had noticed a culture shift. Girls in Gauteng rarely paid for anything.
While Zanele is enjoying the movie, Clive is not. All he could think about was, am I always going to be the one that’s paying for everything in this relationship? His answer to his own question didn’t sit well with him. After the movie, he wanted to go drop Zanele at Midrand Gautrain station. While they waiting for the train to come take Zanele home, Clive asks Zanele the money question 2.0
Why didn’t you buy the popcorn with your own money, he asks? Zanele shocked. Did you want me to buy it with my own money? She asks, in disbelief that they are actually having this conversation. I just thought you wouldn’t have a problem buying the popcorn, that’s why I asked you for the money. Well, I’m not happy about all this, Clive exclaimed. I think you should contribute at least 35 to 40% of our spending’s when we are together. Shocked again Zanele asks, well, if you had said that in the beginning, on our first date, I wouldn’t have agreed to go on a second date with you.
Clive’s expectations on dating
Actually, this Is very strange, did you make your previous girl pay 40 percent on dates? She questions. I didn’t have to make anyone do anything, he replied. In cape town ladies pay for their own drinks all the time. They might, Zanele answered, but we are in Gauteng now. If I must pay for dates with a man I’m only dating, I wouldn’t want him to be my man. I’ll pay for my brother’s bill, friends, family etc, but not a guy who wants me as his girl or future wife. I need to know that he can take care of me. And, if I want, during birthdays and other social occasions, like salaries and project payouts etc. I will spoil my man. But, what you are asking me to do now, is almost impossible.
Well, in that case I don’t think we should see each other again, he concluded. Wait, Zanele stopped in mid-sentence, are we breaking up’ cause of my lack of 35 to 40% contributions? Yes, he said, and drove away. Wow, so these are the relationship stories people talk about when referring to a bad romance?
Zanele was left at Midrand Gautrain station and was dumped by a none boyfriend because of what she said and how quickly things took a wrong turn. How did this even happen? Buying your girl food is a fundamental human right. And, when did men stop providing?
Zanele took the train back home and introspected her short ‘relationship’. She didn’t blame herself for the breakup, she blamed Cape Town.
The end of Chapter One of Short Relationship Stories