no sex zone



Someone once told me, ‘Guys are secretly hoping you don’t sleep with them on the first date so that they can learn to love you whole heartedly’. Whether that someone was Steve Harvey or another guy friend of mine, I can’t remember, but these words ring in my ears.

Guys will invite you over for Netflix and chill but most of the time they invite you over so you guys can do the dirty. Now the question is, to go or not to go? I say go. Go chill, find out what that person is about. if he wants to sleep with you and you want to sleep with him, then girl, it’s your life. But if you want a long lasting relationship with this person, why are you sleeping with him on the first date or even a week into the ‘relationship’ as if sex is ‘running away’?
If he’s not yet your man, chances are he’s got a ton of girls or a couple or just one and if that’s the case he’s probably sleeping with the ton, a couple or just the one. if he sleeps with you immediately… you become part of the ton, no different from the rest.

This guy that found you attractive is secretly wishing you will say no to his advances. He hopes and prays that you will not give in like all the other girls before you, but he will push and he will persist just to see how far he needs to push to get what he wants. Once you have given in, he becomes a little disappointed that you didn’t hold your own; you didn’t put up a fight and asks where your worth is as a woman… #Ironic. To some its just conquests

So you go to his house and you chill and he starts advancing and pushing and whining for sex. What do you do? Say no, no matter how many times he asks, say no. He will be mad and get annoyed, don’t be annoyed with him and don’t be mad either but never do something because you are pressurized, rather do it because you want to. Keep this in mind though, how you treat him will show him how you have treated other guys and eventually respect you or treat you like trash. If the later, then you become like every other girl he has ever slept with and he goes out and looks for another challenge.

Steve Harvey said that the cookie is just a cookie until there are emotions attached to the cookie. But how do you get emotions attached to the cookie? Well… how about spending time him with without touching the cookies, at least that’s what Steve says… the cookie will mean something to him when he has feelings of love and affection towards you as a woman.

He also said that after a couple of months getting to know each other, if you guys still like each other then you guys can go ahead and do the dirty, but if after a couple of months you are not even friends and the relationship feels forced, you can go your separate ways with no ‘attachments’.
Sad truth is, that’s life. While this kind of information is very general, some guys have married their one night stand but you will never know if you are the exception, so why risk it? On the same note… guys that only want sex from you will WAIT for months and eventually leave when you give in, so use your discretion.

If you are not addicted to sex, don’t make it an addiction. And if you want to hang out with your man but don’t want to have sex, then don’t and if you want to, then do. Just don’t let a relationship be all about what’s in between your legs, you have so much more to offer than just your body. And if he leaves because you said, no, wait or not now… then he wasn’t meant for you anyway.


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