Beauty

SCARED OF LONELY

Scared of Lonely: Beyonce

When I first heard Beyoncé singing this song I was like, wow!!! How does such a strong, beautiful, rich, young woman admit to being scared, yet alone to being scared of being alone? The vulnerability in her voice as I listened to her sent shivers down my spine. I continued listening till the end and then downloaded the track. It became my ‘song of the month’ until it lost its initial thought provoking meaning and life returned to normal.

I have never heard any other woman, before and even after Beyoncé released that song admit to being scared of lonely. To a lot of woman admitting fear is admitting defeat. ‘I can’t tell them I’m scared, what they will think of me, how they will see me, my self-pride’.

A lot of people live fake lives at home in their big mansions and their fat bank accounts (ALONE). There is a false sense of happiness. Money doesn’t make you happy, having someone special to share it with does.

We don’t expect strong and successful people to be afraid, let alone to be afraid of being lonely because we assume they are happy. I mean, why wouldn’t we assume that?

I’m scared, and even writing it down makes me uncomfortable. I’m scared of being alone. Scared of being by myself, scared of hearing only my heart beat. You get to a point where all you want is a hug from a significant other, for a person to drive all the way from joburg in the middle of the night to come see you, not for funny bizinz, but to have someone there, holding your hand, cuddling, sharing sweet nothings. That’s happiness

I’m scared. Scared of being in pain and having no one wipe away my tears or hold my hand. I’m scared of waking up at mid-night and have no one to share my dreams with and be soothed by if they were nightmares. I’m scared of getting old by myself. Im scared there wont be anyone taking me out to for dinner LOL. I’m scared to trust anyone but I’m even more scared of not having anyone to trust

These are actual fears. Fears subconsciously locked at the base of almost everyone’s mind that’s single. But these are also fears that are in almost everyone’s mind that’s in a bad or non-productive, none evolving relationship. As human beings we want to be surrounded by genuine and interactive love. And until we find it we will continue to be afraid.

I’m scared, a phrase you will only hear from a person that loves and trusts you. I’m scared. Whenever we admit our deepest fears to one another we give the other person ammunition, and hope they never use it. I’m scared means help me, I feel helpless.

Only when we admit to being afraid of being alone, only then can we work towards not being alone anymore. Like rehab, you have to admit you have a problem in order to get better. In life we have to admit we are lacking so that we can work on getting what we need. If you don’t admit to being scared of being alone, you will never work at solving that problem.

I was scared of being alone. Hek, I’m still scared. Every time he leaves I feel his absence but I am overjoyed when he returns. I’m not one to live alone and I believe people should live by this code; If you are not in a relationship get into one, if he asks to get married, do it and If, and God forbid, you ever divorce, get married again. There are so many people in this world, if you don’t want to be alone, you don’t have to.

XOXO

lonely
scared of lonely

 

Chief Editor for Beliciousmuse.com

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